There is NO Such Thing as a ‘NORMAL’ Amount of Stress
In our modern world, we live with unacceptably high levels of stress and have fooled ourselves into thinking that it is ‘normal’. Society practically celebrates it as people with more stress are often perceived as being ‘more important’ than those with less. Stress is such a part of our lives that we often create stress where there shouldn’t be any. Need proof? Ever been in the car with a driver who started to become visibly upset with slow moving traffic — even though neither of you are in a hurry? Or, how about people who just cannot relax on the beach with a book when on vacation? It is as if we don’t know what to do with ourselves if we are not feeling the nervous rush of stress.
Unfortunately, the physical effects of stress are all too prevelant: the digestive issues, insomnia, tight muscles in the back and neck, and headaches that have become part of daily life for just about everyone. But curiously, most people only pay notice to their stress when it rises above their usual level (which is already too high). This higher level is typically the result of something new being added to the pile, such as being assigned a project at work, issues with children or parents, or some other additional responsibility. This creates a turmultuous cycle of behavior: first of overwhelm or even fear, then anger, and then a stress-release which often involves taking the frustration out on innocent bystanders, typically family or co-workers. At this higher stress level, people simply have no bandwidth to handle anything more, so they find themselves short-tempered, snapping at loved ones and then living with the consequences of their terrible behavior (which fuels the next stress cycle). The everyday stress and especially the stress cycles take a real physical toll on the human body. It can only take so much and then it will signal you with more and more symptoms. This is usually when disease and disorders show up in the body. Funny thing is, if you don’t stop and rest, the body will eventually force you to slow down by making you sick. Ever notice how many people get sick right after a major stress event - even while on vacation? It is not a coincidence.
In my past, working for almost 30 years in Corporate America, I have been in environments where it was expected and even celebrated to work 75 hours a week. This is the height of insanity and we wonder why we are so sick despite all of the innovations in healthcare. The Japanese have a word ‘Karoshi’ which literally translated means ‘death by overwork’. In my career, I remember a cluster of years where someone would literally drop dead at their desk from a heart attack or a stroke. Of course, this finally led to the hosting of annual ‘Health and Wellness Fairs’ where we were told to reduce our stress through exercise, taking walks outside, and even horseback riding. Note: These are all fine activities but they do not come close to addressing the real problem.
In my work as a cancer and chronic illness wellness coach, I am often floored when working with clients and they initially tell me that their stress level is ‘fine’. (Hint: They wouldn’t be talking to me about their serious illness if that were the case). But, as we start digging a little deeper, they soon realize just how much stress they are truly carrying and how it is affecting their health. The body is an amazing creation and will compensate for as long as it can – but there will come the day when it just cannot anymore.
The solution is not medication, cramming down a mouth full of supplements, or taking a walk. It is about retraining your mind to calm you instead of putting you into a panic. It is about monitoring your thoughts and emotions, analyzing them for stress and negativity, and reframing them to positive. It is about unlocking your power to control what you think and how you feel — it really is a choice.
So what is ‘normal’ anyway? It simply means that the majority of people are doing something. In our modern world, the majority of people are stressed out, anxious and chronically ill. If this is normal, then count me out!